Can we talk?

Let me rephrase that, ‘cause I KNOW I can talk…most of the people I know would tell you that I hardly ever shut the fuck up. Truth is, I don’t actually talk all that much, but at times I can chatter, believe me. What I meant was to each other.

Anyway, rephrase…can I prevail upon all of you, my loyal and faithful readers, to do your erstwhile Cap’n a favor or two?

In an effort to expand my reader base from all three of you to…gasp…maybe as many as a dozen folks, I would really, really appreciate it if you could do one or more of the following…

One…go to the Facebook (boy, there’s a dirty word these days) icon over to the left (Alex, that’s your other left) and click on it to get to the Welcome Aboard The R U Kidding blog’s FB page; there you can either “like” the Cap’n or “follow” the Cap’n or both.

All those in favor of both liking AND following the Cap’n, please raise your right hands (Alex, that’s your other left).

Two…please take a moment from your busy schedules to “share” the Cap’n’s page with all of your 75 bajillion FB friends. I’ve spoken to several million of them already and they’re excited about receiving this information.


Three…over in that same menu is a little Twitter “tweety bird” icon; if you click on that, it will take you to the Twitter logon page. If you’re a Twitter user, logon and enter @LuvCapnJohn, and then please follow me on President Tweety Bird’s favorite social media platform.

Four…please tell everyone in your family, all your friends, all the people you work with, your cousin Rodney, everyone you socialize with or go to church with or your girls down at the beauty parlor or the guys in your cell-block or in your neighborhood all about the Cap’n, and give them my website address:

Five…please send me a check, in any amount which contains a large number of zeroes after the first one or two digits…okay, never mind that one.

Six…please keep coming back to read the silly things that I write about; as I said in my post “THE CAP’N, AS HUMBLE WRITER”, back on 12/6/17, even if I didn’t have a reader in the world, I would still write the WATRUK blog, because I am my own biggest fan.

But it’s a helluva’ lot more fun with you guys onboard.

You see, my whole stated purpose here, from the get-go back on October 1st of last year, was to bring a few moments of laughter, of mirth, of happiness if you will to the good folks who take the time to read my blog. Maybe not a noble pursuit, but one that I have undertaken seriously, all evidence to the contrary notwithstanding.

Thomas Hobbes, the 17th century author and philosopher, once opined that life is “nasty, brutish and short”, and while I’ve always thought that to be a little harsh, Hobbes had a point. Let’s face it, sometimes, life sucks.

So if the stories I write can give my readers a bit of respite from the nasty, brutish world, then I have achieved my goal and I am satisfied. (Making a couple of bucks on the side wouldn’t break my heart, either.)

Wasn’t Nasty Brutish the bad guy in the old Popeye cartoon strip? (Actually, I found out from WikiPedia that it was originally “Brutus” and then later his name was changed to “Bluto”; after leaving the comic strip, he went on to star in the 1978 comedy hit Animal House.)

So the more mateys I can reach with the WATRUK blog, the more I can provide that moment or two of comic relief to those folks out there who, right now, have never heard of the Cap’n, and mores the pity for them.

Look at this as a “charitable” thing…by helping me spread the word about the Cap’n, you’ll be helping possibly millions of cranky, unhappy persons achieve some hilarity in their bleak, shitty lives.

Won’t you take a moment and make a donation, excuse me, to make a difference? (Sad yet lilting violin music starts to be heard in the background here.)

Like your Cap’n, follow your Cap’n on both Facebook and Twitter, share the good news on FB and in person and then sit back with a smug, self-satisfied look on your face, knowing that you did a good deed for someone out there.

Who knows, maybe that someone will be really pleased that you did and give you a bajillion dollars.

You guys are great, I don’t care what the chief of police says.

Love and using social media for the benefit of mankind,

Cap’n John

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