FOE TOES_PART DEUX (THAT’S FRENCH FOR SALAMI FINGERS)

 

Free beer for everyone…

Considering the number of folks who are regular readers of the Welcome Aboard The R U Kidding blog, that would amount to approximately a six-pack, making my investment rather minimal. As Otter said in Animal House, it was time for a futile and stupid gesture on my part.

It’s been several weeks since I’ve posted a series of photos/captions, and since I really enjoy these, along with the Facebook friends of an Facebook friend (hi, Angel and Emma, happy day to you), I figured it was time. And I’m dedicating today’s post to an old friend (well, she’s not THAT old); happy happy, Ms. LB…sorry I’ve been such a shitty friend lately, but the call of the sea has just been too strong.

So here we go, together, to have and to hold, from this day forward, in sickness and in…well, never mind that now.

“Okay, Andre got the bread, Francois, you go steal some butter, Jacques, you find some milk and I’ll go get some salami fingers, okay?”

Sadly, the accident caused that day’s mail to arrive late…even more sadly, to this day the USPS is still running behind. (And why is that cop hiding behind that tree?)

Truly, I believe this explains why some species eat their young. (Thank you, Rodney Dangerfield.)

I am absolutely certain that my mother would have loved to do this to me many, many times, despite the fact that I was a model child.

Oswald Pfefferdink and his mechanic, Clyde, just prior to taking their newest creation, the Hupmobile BuggyBeater, for it’s inaugural test drive. Tragically, the car, known in racing circles by it’s nickname the “Beater”, was rear-ended by a horse-drawn Conestoga wagon, causing it to lose the 55-gallon drum of fuel that rests behind the driver, which then rolled into an adjacent field, ignited and burned the field and Mortimer Pfarthing’s barn to the ground. Fortunately, no animals were harmed in the making of this automobile. (Mortimer was pretty pissed though.)

The Mad Magazine “Spys” have their horse repossessed, due to non-payment of the loan.

“…in other news from Washington, President Donald Trump was paid a visit today by an undisclosed number of family members and friends. The visitors, who arrived unannounced from the planet BiggMacc, are shown here landing in Maryland’s Chesapeake Bay; they then entered limousines and drove on to the Capital, where the Trumps entertained the group at a gala White House dinner, which featured salami fingers.”

Greta Van Foxtwaddle, shown here with her new chauffeur, Hans, preparing for his driving test; if successful, Hans will be the first non-native Austrian to be employed by the Foxtwaddle’s. Hans is from England, and is used to driving on the right side of the road.

“…if I do, I’m gonna’ get my chops busted, I know I am…they’ll cut off my MilkBones for sure.” Anyone who has, or has had a dog for a companion knows that canines have a mischievous side to their personalities.

Men who were hung like stud horses made excellent use of these pants…those of us who were less endowed, i.e. hung like stud chipmunks, not so much.

He sold his soul to rock n’ roll at an early age…party on, Wayne.

The ladies of the Cap’n John Krissongs Fan Club and Chowder Society, shown here waving goodbye to their hero as he leaves port on the Kidding…afterwards, they adjourned to the home of fan club President, Mabel Slumgarten, for a light lunch of salami fingers and various adult beverages.

I’ll leave you with this quote from President Richard M. Nixon…

“Things are more like today than they have ever been before.”

Love and auto-focus,

Cap’n John

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