FUTILITY, THY NAME IS AGING WANNABE ROCK STARS

I started playing drums when I was a few months short of my 14th birthday, played all through high school in a number of “garage bands” (these bands ranged on the Cap’n John Suck Meter from “awful” all the way up to “moderately tolerable”), switched to guitar when I was 17+, and rest, as they say, is geography.

I was a member of a couple of pretty good groups, one in particular back in 1973-4…we played around the northern Illinois and lower Wisconsin area and there was talk of agents and record contracts for a time, and then we fell apart and the earth continued to turn.

But I don’t think you ever lose the desire, or the dreams…

Hey, I can dream, okay?

And as long as we’re on the subject of “air guitars”…

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And speaking of “concept cars” (yeah, okay, we weren’t, but we could have been, right?), by applause, how many of you think this vehicle looks like a Corvette, a late-model Firebird, an old Chevy Corvair, a great white shark, a french horn, a raisin bagle and a couple of gallons of electric blue paint, all thrown together into a REALLY big blender and shuffled around for a few minutes.

The car was part of the CERV series of experimental vehicles produced by Chevy, (I believe the acronym stood for “Chimney Elf and Rhino Vaginas” but don’t quote me), and although the program has been going on since back in the ’60s, the version you see below was built in 1990.

Given that the vehicle has two front ends, the transmission did not have an “R” position, but instead two “D” slots, allowing it to go forward in both directions, while still going nowhere, much like the Republican Party over the past two decades.

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Now here was a great car…I owned this little beauty back in the mid-80s, and I still miss it a bunch. A 1974 Porsche 914, which had a mid-engine mount, AIR-COOLED, fuel-injected flat-four, as well as a targa top, a 5-speed trans, all the Porsche handling and suspension tricks and it was a fun little driver. It was just at 100 horsepower, but the car was so light, it still got up and went when called upon to do so.

Geez, creeping nostalgia has overtaken me…gah, I’m being consumed, help, I’m being sucked under, help me, help me, Obi Wan, you’re my last hope, ahhhhhhhh……..never mind.

If I’m ever forced to grow up, it’ll probably kill me.

Love and 33 LPs,

Cap’n John

Post Script…Dodgers against the winner of the Nats/Cubs series for the League Championship, coming soon to a baseball field somewhere.

Think Blue, you mangy dogs.

Post Post Script…from the cartoonist Wiley…”Knowledge Ruins Everything”; using this as your postulate, and making a (guarded) assumption of the accuracy of the opposite statement, that ignorance is therefore everything, then proving incompetence in our current administration becomes pro forma. (“Pro forma” is Latin for “morons”, as you may recall.)

Post Toasties…

Think Blue, mateys…

Okay, everyone, take five…smoke’m if you got’em…

 

2 thoughts on “FUTILITY, THY NAME IS AGING WANNABE ROCK STARS

  1. Hey John,

    This is sime truly funny stuff right here. You are a really wittt giy and it definitely comes out here. Keep it up!!

    Alex

    • Ahoy, Alex, welcome abroad. Actually, re the “witty” stuff, you aren’t aware of this, but I have a twin brother, and when we were kids, back around the last Ice Age, everyone called us the Wit Brothers…Dim and Half.
      Thank you for your kind words, sir, and please keep reading…it could get worse.
      Cap’n John

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